I am fearless. • I am a self-proclaimed adrenaline junkie. • I am an eternal optimist. • I value kindness above most all else. • I believe in finding the good in everyone and everything, even if we have to search for it.
I love me… but it wasn’t always that way.
I used to try to be what I thought I should be. What others expected me to be. I loved playing a role and not making waves.
What’s funny is that I was not this way when I was younger. Somewhere in my mid-20s I lost my way. I don’t know what triggered it, but I forgot how to be ME, exactly as I am. I forgot how to love ME, for exactly who I was. I was not truly happy and I could never figure out why.
As I turned 50 though, everything changed. Most people bemoan the mid-life thing, and there are studies that say the 50s are when people are least happy, but I don’t understand that, lol, turning 50 was like a wake-up call for me.
I think I just started to feel my mortality. I realized that life is damn short and I should not live one more minute of it being someone I’m not. Not one minute without adoring myself, all parts of myself, even the not perfect parts. Take away my occasional lazy tendency and you take away my spontaneity and a good portion of my creativity and ingenuity!
I decided to embrace the real me!
If I love wearing all black and having purple hair and arms covered in tattoos, then dammit, that’s what I should do!
I have to tell you, I’m honestly the happiest I’ve been in my whole fucking life!
It’s still hard at times, the fear of being judged is strong, but I’m embracing the mantra “If you don’t like it, go away” 😀
This realization not only changed my life, but it also changed my art completely! I’m still on a creative journey, playing and exploring, but I feel a freedom in my art that I never felt before!
I work in pen & ink, and watercolor. Combining the soft fluidity of watercolor with the bold lines of pen & ink speaks to the yin yang inside of me! Mandala elements are a big part of my art; I love the calming, peaceful feelings they evoke.
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